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And speaking of men, God forbid if I don't modify any statements about my husband with, "He's a really big help…" Yeah, he was a big help. And nobody could tell me any different. I was convinced I might need to be hospitalized. But even if he changed every single diaper and gave every single bath and went to every single pediatrician's appointment, fathering a newborn doesn't hold a candle to mothering one. I mean, even those terms speak for themselves. And then, roughly two hours later, I would be presented with my child, by my husband or another family member, telling me it was time to do it all again. But Friday took a turn for the awful and we didn't run our final entries.

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Shayla. Age: 22.
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Both of my tits were gross.

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Annalee. Age: 25.
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But even if he changed every single diaper and gave every single bath and went to every single pediatrician's appointment, fathering a newborn doesn't hold a candle to mothering one. Of course, the worst came when I discovered, to my horror, that my left nipple became semi-detached from my areola. It's none of your business. Although lactivists are secretly judging the latter for not being dedicated enough in their efforts to do the "best" thing for their child. Because that's what it's like: burning, stabbing, sharp, deep, wide, thick, soul-sucking pain that will cause your asshole to constrict so far up into your body that you fear you might choke on it.

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