They were right to spank me

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As long parent doesn't leave a mark on a child, it should be logical. I had experience during my childhood when my parent spank me. I had become a better person not to disrespect other and avoid being bad.

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Photo courtesy of Flickr contributor Brunurb. The indictment of Minnesota Vikings running back Adrian Peterson in September on charges of child abuse has prompted a heated public debate about the role of physical punishment in child rearing. Rather than trying to find the line between spanking and abuse, however, we should be talking about how parents teach their children right from wrong—without hitting them.

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Spanking looks to be instantly effective. If a child is misbehaving—if he keeps swearing, or playing with matches—and then you spank that child, the behavior stops immediately. The effect is so apparently obvious that it can drive a sort of delusion.

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Verified by Psychology Today. Insight Therapy. I was quite new to America at the time, and knew little about the lives of American families.

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By Dr. CNN I think it's safe to assume that most parents who spank their kids love them very much. I've never met one who said otherwise.

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Another serious risk of spanking is the increased risk of criminal child abuse. When we strike our child, our brain experiences our child as a threat and we are essentially disconnected emotionally from him. The part of our brain that can feel how our child feels is turned off line.

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Minnesota Vikings star running back Adrian Peterson was indicted for negligent injury to a child after he whipped his 4-year-old son bloody with a slim tree branch in September as punishment for pushing one of his siblings. The football player, and many others, seemed surprised that police got involved in what seemed to him a family matter. The incident turned up the heat under a simmering national argument about how to discipline children and about ethnic and regional differences in the use of corporal punishment.

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Quitting spanking is possible. How often you spank your child, the reasons for which you spank, whether your parents spanked you and how entrenched your belief system and self-talk is in spanking are some determining factors for the level of difficulty you will have with stopping spanking. Whatever it takes for you to stop spanking, I urge you to do the work.

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Despite all the warnings and criticism, four out of five parents still spank their kids. Many experts believe the negative consequences outweigh any behavior benefits. Who's right?

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I firmly believe that it is not only unnecessary to spank children, but that it is detrimental in several ways. First, parenting is not a role we play, it is a relationship process and hitting teaches children to fear the parent and breaks the strong attachment of love and bonding between them. Discipline is easier when the relationship is one bound by love.

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